OK everything is in order. I have my Belichickesque lucky hooded sweatshirt on, food and beverages with reach, properly padded chair, rid hands of all traces of pine tar....Let's Liveblog!
Some lineup changes. Encarnacion is out Taguchi is in. Ronnie Belliard is batting 5th. Casey is playing at first. We get to see pitchers bat...woohoo. NL baseball, baby. I just cant want to see all the bunting and double switches tonight.
First a song from Jet. What better was to start a game of America's pastime than with a song by an Aussie rock band. Well musically it's downhill from here. I hate you Jeanne Zelasko. Interrupting Ernie Harwell mid-story during last years All-Star Game should have gotten you demoted to kick ball games in Wyoming. Joe Girardi doesn't like that sticky feeling. GET AWAY FROM ME JOHN MELLENCAMP! Could they get a gayer song to bring the Tigers out to? Is that Chumbawumba? Well the Cards coming out to circus music isn't any better. I'm waiting for the entire team to pop out of a bullpen car. TRACE ADKINS HAS VOICE IMODULATION SYNDROME.
Top of the 1st:
Those are the gayest "keys to the game" ever. Granderson strikes out, making it roughly 1,565 for the season. Broken bat blooper to Jim Edmonds from Monroe, and there is two away. The midget guns out Polanco to end the Tigers half of the inning.
Bottom of the 1st:
And we have our first bunt of the game. A lot of good that did. One down. Liner that is drawn into the gravitational pull around Polanco's head for out two. Yes, Joe Buck Santiago is out, but it puts their normal starting first baseman in, how is that a disadvantage? 1-2-3 off to the 2nd. 0-0. When did Jay-Z turn into Puffy?
Top of the 2nd:
Carpenter does not fear the Mullet, as he lines out to Mr Miaygi. OK you guys know you can take a pitch or two right? To the bottom.
Bottom of the 2nd:
That's not irony Joe, that's a coincidence. Rolen does his best Beltran impersonation, one down. Good to see Casey can run without his leg falling off. I'm sure if it did we would see it numerous times in slow motion. Did Chris Myers just call Nate Robertson a nerd? Wow St. Louis has some ugly ass people. I wonder if Randy Marsh has a child named Stan? Monroe, straight playa hating in left field...sorry I channeled Stu Scott there. After 2 it's scoreless.
Top of the 3rd:
At least Fox is doing a better job of getting back from commercials, before a pitch is thrown. There's a nice drive with a wood, base hit Inge. Woo Hoo time for a bunt. Boooring...Chris Carpenter does not like to share. He bounces one in and Inge is at third. Granderson grounds out to end the threat.
Bottom of the 3rd:
Arnold from Happy Days lines out to start the inning. So does Carpenter, enter the Midget. I wonder if he is dedicating the series to Nelson De La Rosa? Granderson getting some action in the outfield, he catches Eckstein's offering to end the inning. Scoreless after 3.
Top of the 4th:
C-Mo to start it off. And the whiff. Eckstein has range. Polanco grounds out. Sulu reels in Ordonez's line drive for the third out.
Bottom of the 4th:
Joe Buck mentions no hits...Bang, Wilson gets a hit. You jinxing homer bastard. Pujols reaches out and touches one. Ground rule double, saves a run for the Tigers. Crap, bases loaded, no one out. This does not bode well. Big out, Belliard grounds to 3rd, force at home. Good to see that Inge is able to hit Pudge at home when it counts. A ground ball would be nice. Not that kind of ground ball dammit. Edmonds down the line scores two. Intentional walk to Molina to load the bases for Margaret Cho. Infield fly, 2 down and up comes the pitcher. Gets him to pop out to Casey. End of the 4th Cardinals up 2-0.
Top of the 5th:
Hey it's a hit. Strikeout to end the inning. Here's the part of the liveblog when I get pissy and quiet.
Bottom of the 5th:
The Midget gets his first hit of the series, followed by a strikeout and pop out by Wilson and Pujols. Nate Robertson leaves the game with a Belliard strike out to end the inning. Still 2-0 Cards.
Top of the 6th:
Down 1-2-3, this is not looking good.
Bottom of the 6th:
I've cracked open the Ketel One, and may be drinking to forget shortly. Forgive my terrible joke, but shouldn't Cory Lidle have received the Roberto Clemente Award? It's Zumaya time. I want to see the dark spot on his pants when Lloyd has to step in against some 100+ mph heat.
Inning over still 2-0 Cards.
Computer problems, and Zumaya firing one into the third row might see the end of the liveblog.